Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A Great Pearl: Lessons told from a beautiful perspective...

I suppose along this journey of cabin blogging, there will be times such as this when my heart is so full of "Life," that I must pour it out to you...

A heart full of Life...
"Unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth & dies, it remains by itself alone. But if it dies, it bears much fruit..." John 12:24

It is absolutely amazing to me, how death brings life... That is truth. In order for there to be new life, there must be death... We can see this in nature all around us. Leaves falling now, new life to come in Spring.

How can it possibly be, that the very death of the one I held more dear than any other, my husband, is bringing forth MUCH life in me??? How can it be? That is truth...

It is only by the grace & power of the one true God that I can be thriving, growing, blossoming, learning, loving during a time of such tremendous loss, pain, suffering, & affliction... It is God's grace that is sustaining me. But not just sustaining me, Strengthening me. Making me stronger than I was before. Empowering me with boldness & understanding that I did not know before. It really has nothing to do with me at all. It is His power flowing through this vessel that is filling me with LIFE... What a powerful pearl.....

This is the message of this season of my life.
This season...
Seasons change, always. But there are always seasons. If there were not seasons, there would be no new life. Each season has it's purpose, & with it comes new life...

There are many stories about the man I loved & the relationship we shared that need to be told, but the one the Spirit of God has laid heavy upon my heart is this....

Stewart & I had a crazy love adventure. One that after 2 years of friendship & secretly in love with eachother, but never saying a word about it or acting upon, only praying for God's guidance, Stewart decided it was time to make a move.

It was our first "date." We spent a day at the lake, waterskiing of course, & it was amazing... Our first time really "alone" together on a planned outing. I was thinking, "he must really like me."

I had gotten back in the boat after an endurance slalom run & Stewart asked me to drive the boat. I sat in the driver's seat happy to do it. He put a blindfold over my eyes & said, "I want to see how much you trust me..."
I never flinched. I let him blindfold me, & I drove that boat down the lake, 40 mph, completely blindfolded, trusting him, listening for his guidance, for his every word telling me which way to turn, to steer... I trusted him 100%...
I never asked him why he did that. I wish I had. I would love to know what compelled Stewart to do such a thing. Then again, I know why he did it...

He told me we were going to eat at a friend's house for lunch. When we got to our destination, (by me blindly driving us), he helped me out of the boat & led me up to a beautiful waterfall.
When we got up to the top, Stewart removed the blindfold from my eyes, & with a dozen roses in 1 hand & my hand upon his wildly beating heart, with tears in his eyes, he told me for the first time that he was in love with me, & that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me...
He then asked me to join him in a period of courtship. A time of dating & getting to know eachother much better with the intention that we were getting married. Of course, I said heck yes...

This event is so vivid in my mind right now, because the Spirit of God is showing me that this is exactly where I am at right now with the Lord. I am at a place of blindly trusting God with my life, my future. It's a scary place to be. I feel as if the Lord has a blindfold on me & is leading me as I am driving the course of my life. He is wanting to court me, to whisper in my ear, "turn this way, turn that way," as I blindly trust Him... All the while He is wanting to be my husband.
What that truly means is not understandable to me at this point. But then, that is the blind journey of discovery I am on...

The blind journey of trust with Stewart to our destination led to the beautiful climax of love unfolding, love revealed & manifested fully.

I am on the blind journey now & the Lord has placed himself as head over me, leading me to the destination. What that will look like no one knows. But God is the God of HOPE, & the God of RESTORATION, so I know & fully expect there to be a beautiful climax that unfolds...

"These light & momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes on what is UNSEEN & not on what is seen. For what is seen is temporary, & what is UNSEEN is ETERNAL..." 2 Cor 4:17-18 NIV

Psalm 34...

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Stairs are in! Floor is on its way...

And, here we go...
It's been a while since I posted a blog entry, so this one is heavy laden with pictures. I hope you enjoy!

A few weeks after Stewart was killed, my dad & I went out and painted the windows. It was actually my first time out since that day. I realized then that this cabin is more a piece of my heart than I realized. I feel such a peace out there, a quiet peace that is reviving & healing....

A special story I would like to share with you... 2 days before Stewart passed, we were out there together having a great day putting those windows in. It's amazing to me how fragile life really is, & how we just never know what tomorrow holds. My perspective on life & what I really need to value has shifted so dramatically; but what a blessing that is...
Just like any day, we were cutting up, flirting with eachother, laughing, sharing life, as we were putting the windows in the cabin. We were also tossing back & forth which color we wanted to paint the windows, a maple red or an olive green.
When we left that day, we were in Stewart's truck driving away. All of a sudden, Stewart quickly stopped the truck, & said, "I just have to see that cabin one more time..." He put the truck in park, & got out & turned around to stand & stare at the beautiful cabin we had created. I got out as well & walked over to Stewart, putting my arm around him as together we stared at our creation. I made the comment that I was leaning towards maple red for the windows. He said as well, "yeah, I'm definately leaning towards the red..." It was a sweet moment...

Even sweeter, is thinking back to that & the fact that something in him told him to get out & look at the beautiful cabin he had created. We didn't know it would be the last time he would ever see it... At least on this side...

That's why I went with red windows. Because of that last conversation we had about it, I knew Stewart was leaning towards the red...
I have been so blessed to have some awesome guys that have been willing to come out & help me along on the garage & get it finished. I'm so thankful for them!! Will (LHBA member), brought out some friends, & they did a fantastic job putting the stairs together. Thanks guys!
Once the stairs were built, my friends John & Kennon came out & helped me put the stairs into place. Those stairs are heavy, as you can imagine! We used a chain hoist & hooked the stairs up using straps, then hoisted the stairs into place. It took 4 hours!
We used left over cypress logs for the stairs, & I had some fir cut for the risers. I'm pretty happy with they way they've turned out.


Will had some left over wooden pegs from the timber frame home he built, so we used them on the stairs.
John & Kennon have been so awesome to come out & help me to finish this garage. Thanks guys!! We have been working to get the floors finished. Almost there as you can see. Just a little bit more.

Charles, cutting some tongue & groove flooring to pass up. Below is the underside of the flooring. We also got the first portion of electrical done, getting ready for the garage doors to be put in.

Another picture of the open living space flooring almost complete. Below, a picture looking down the stairwell.
We also got the loft floor almost finished. Below is a few pictures of the loft, flooring, & just the architecture. I'm loving the colors.
What a cool ceiling!! The acoustics in here are great!

View from the loft. It's pretty cozy up there. Check out the job John did cutting the T&G around that ridge pole support log (RPSL).

Next up, we'll get the framing finished, then we'll be ready to finish the electrical & put some doors on this thing. Stay tuned!